bye bye '08
hello 2009!!
hello 2009!!
having a little fun with the condensation on my bedroom window. my window's sweaty, haha. anyway, i was going to make another end of the year list but dang, that last list took so long. i got a little carried away. but here's a list anyway...i'll try to make it short(er).
best 5 moments of 2008:
5. moving to california.
- granted, i haven't been loving living in california for most parts. however, living in california has always been a dream of mines since as long as i can remember. in truth, i believe i just don't enjoy this area of california...it's too small town for me rather than big city, it just feels like there would be more to do near the city. i hope to one day move closer to the city life i've always dreamed of. the fact i'm already in california just brings me closer to that dream. maybe after a couple of years this place might actual feel like home.
4. runner runner music video shoot.
- i'm so glad i got to go and be a part of their music video. i won't write a long rant about it now since i've already done it here. but i will say this, was a very fun day. and it was nice to see familar faces (still can't get over the fact nick totally remembered me) and meet a few new ones as well.
3. incubus concerts.
- refer to previous entry. let's just say all those concerts should fall right here on this list.
2. spring semester.
- one of the best semesters. all my classes were of those i actually enjoyed going to, which might explain how i ended up with straight "a's" for the first (and last?) time in college. lunches with brooke and/or sara were the best part of each school day. actually being part of art events. the printmaking room: litho and letterpress. the art building was my second home. share-a-bike. first fridays. bar/house/apartment parties. girls night. dancing all night. the 14th (13th) floor/apartment. much, much, more...and of course the reason behind all of it, what makes it the best...all my friends, old and new.
1. my 23 birthday.
- best birthday i've had in a long time. i usually forgo parties and end up just having a dinner or something. but this year, i figured since it was probably the last b-day i'll have with my friends, why not make it "the best day ever!" and to me it was. the dinner was awesome and i was so thankful for everyone that showed up. the party back at the apartment was crazy...jell-o shot snorting, champagne, cupcakes...everywhere, flower people, polroids, the half-eaten apple pipe, extreme edward 40 hand, and even more friends/people showing up. and i can't help but love that my friends and mostly my roommates help make that day #1 for me in 2008.
worst 5 moments of 2008:
5. elise getting mono and leaving school.
- she was my partner in crime. and having to say "good-bye" to a friend is never easy. in fact, i didn't even get the chance to say it in person. the night (or night before?) she was leaving was hard for me. with everything else on my mind at that point (see #1 on this list) this was a breaking point and i ended up breaking down...thankfully the boys next door happen to be awesome friends.
4. moving to california.
- ok, so this also is on my "best" list and like i said up there, for most part moving to california seemed like a bad idea. it just seems like the timing was bad. the location kind of sucks. and i can't help but feel loneliner than ever here. but i'm making the best of it and still have hope for something better. only time will time if this really belongs in the "best" or "worst" moments of my lifetime. though being #4 here and #5 on the "best"...that might be saying something, at least for 2008.
3. having to miss out and many things because i'm here and not there.
- it's not just about living in california while a bunch of my friends are still in hawaii. it also the fact that i'm in california with so much happening around me...yet, i'm still too far to go to them (especially since i'll be alone). it's not fun hearing about everything going on in places i want to be but aren't. plus, i'm a homebody. somedays that's fine...but i've never liked the feeling of being left out, worst feeling ever.
2. having to say good-bye to hawaii/all my friends and family.
- for all the years i've been wanting out of hawaii...now that i got that chance, sometimes i can't help but feel like i want to go back. everyday, i catch myself thinking of certain places, events, moments of the past and end up missing hawaii like crazy. it has been my home for most of my life so far. up until recently, it's all i've ever known...and it hurts sometimes to be so far away. and it should go without saying that what i miss most of all are my friends and family. i hate knowing i'm missing out on seeing the kids grow up. i hate not living next door to family (and people who were pretty much family). and my friends. it's just hard. funny, just when i feel like i'm actually a part of something, that i can be comfortable with being me...i have to start over again...and alone.
1. the aftermath of a broken heart.
- i wrote about this here and a few entries in my old blog here. i can honestly say for the most part i'm over it. i mean it doesn't hurt as bad as it did...it doesn't even really hurt anymore. though sometimes i still find myself thinking about him every so often but then i stop and it's done. ugh, i hated how i ended up feeling because of him. and then having to see him around almost everyday was painful. but i guess, a plus for moving to california, is i don't have to be around him, that he's not a part of my life (no more stupid run-ins and no more me trying to make him like me - even as a friend).
and with that said, i'm still nursing a broken heart of a different kind...having to leave my love ones, having to leave my heart, at least a part of it, in hawaii.
i tried to keep it short(er). it kind of worked.
tomorrow is the last day of 2008...
till later.
